"May the Invite Arrive, but the Guest Stay Away" – The Irony of Modern Invitations

"May the Invite Arrive, but the Guest Stay Away" – The Irony of Modern Invitations

There is an old Nepali proverb: "Nimto pugos, pahuna naaowos" (May the invitation arrive, but may the guest never show up).

It seems we have taken this a bit too literally lately. Perhaps it’s because we are all "too busy," but the modern way of inviting someone has become incredibly cold. You’ll be minding your own business when—flick—a digital invitation card slides into your Messenger inbox without a single word of context. No "Sir," no "Brother," no "Namaste," and certainly no personal request to "Please come." Just a silent image file.

The recipients are just as busy. Our inboxes are so cluttered with this "junk mail" that we don’t even bother checking them. And since we haven’t "checked" the message, there’s no social pressure to cancel our plans and attend. It’s a perfect way to save time and money.

In fact, this "junk invitation" style benefits both sides in a strange way. The host can complain, "I did invite them, but they just didn’t show up," while secretly being relieved that their catering bill will be lower. The guest can shrug and say, "Oh, I never saw the message," while enjoying their free weekend.

Personally, a fancy graphic that cost a designer a lot of money doesn't move me. I am much more touched by a simple, heartfelt SMS. Those are the invitations that actually stick in the mind.

Take last month, for example. Sangeeta Angbuhang didn't just "flick" a card into my inbox. She followed up with a personal touch: "Daju, please do come to my daughter’s Weaning Ceremony (Pasni)." That simple sentence was enough to make my brain's internal diary immediately mark down: March 23, India Club.

Wishing little Saira Hangma Karki a life of happiness, good health, and longevity.